Dead Eddie.

I didn’t go to school since friday but I feel like it’s been ages. I’m probably going tomorrow morning.
But it feels so great not to go. I always feel so free when I know I should be in class but I’m not. The best thing is to get up early like I do when I go to school but go in town to skateboard instead.

I have a friend called Julian. I don’t know if I already wrote about him. I call him “Le Poulet”. It’s a long story but basically, he’s my chicken and I’m his chicken. I don’t know exactly what he is to me. Our other mates think we’re best friends but I don’t know if we are. We might be, I’m not sure.
As I study creative arts we don’t go to the same school anymore. And my school is very far from his. So we have a rule : We can’t spend more than fourteen days without seeing each other. Unless there’s really no other option.
He went to Mexico for about two weeks during the holidays so we had to break the fourteen day rule.
The last time I saw him before he left, he hugged me very very tight. Which felt good, even though I’m not a big fan of hugs. Coming from him it was a good feeling.

When he came back we were both really excited to see each other again. But when we did it wasn’t the same, it wasn’t great, like it always was before. We both still had fun, mainly because we were at a party. We usually have this domesticity thing going on. So much that people usually think we’re together. This time we didn’t.
It scares me. I have this thing, when I get along with someone I always get tired of them at some point. So I stop seeing them, and I forget them.

I don’t want this to happen, I don’t want to grow tired of him.
For the first time I actually care about someone. For the first time I know someone I wouldn’t be scared of sticking with if something bad happenned.
I don’t know if he would do the same. And I don’t care.

I don’t care because he makes me a better person. Somehow, sometimes, he makes me see the world the way he sees it, in his very own beautiful and optimistic way. I find it very annoying. But he makes me less pessimictic and less selfish.

I think some of the best moments of my life were when I was sitting on the kitchen floor with him and loads of chocolate.

I don’t want to grow tired of him. I don’t want to forget him. Not this time.
Not yet.

Bunchaflowers.

One of many fans.
K.